The weirdest things happen when you least expect them. At least, that’s what seems to be true in my life. So, as I previously updated, I had the medical exam Monday and that was enough excitement for me for one day. But it doesn’t end there.
I keep getting phone calls during my 8pm class and even afterwards. I think that it’s Kev, one of my friends that I met while I studied in University. I called him before my 8pm class but he was in the middle of a meeting. So I just ignored it until I got home. And then, I actually check my phone when I get home. It’s M.
“Oh Great” I’m thinking. “He wants to dispute another grammar question or pronunciation question with me.” So I call him back. He’s out drinking in my area and wanted to see what I was up to, in his happy drunk self. Except he’s drinking because he had a bad first job interview so really, he needed some consolation so he went out with a buddy to go drinking to wash his sadness down. Well, he said if he had anytime left that night, he would call back and see if I was awake to talk or see him for a bit. I said that’s fine but I didn’t think he was actually serious about this. Many Koreans have a funny way of promising something without delivering.
Except 10 minutes later I get a phone call from him again and he is on his way to my place. So I meet up and invite him in to talk. So we talk for about an hour or so, talking about this and that and then I tell him, “Well, it’s getting late. You should probably catch a bus to get home.” “What? No, I’m staying here tonight.” Hahahaha. Wow, I definitely wasn’t expecting that one. I was expecting to talk for a little bit and then he leaves. Especially since he has a girlfriend. Not that he doesn’t mention it every 30 seconds. And I dislike her right now. A LOT. So I kinda have no respect for her. But if her boyfriend needs to constantly remind himself outloud that he has a girlfriend and that we are just friends, it probably means he is thinking something else. At least, that’s what it has seemed like from every instance I have seen. I even asked him why he keeps reminding me that he has a girlfriend. He couldn’t give me a straight answer.
Anyway, so I tell him, fine, he can sleep over. Just let me try to get some work done and shower. He has other things on the mind. And you know, I would so be for that. Let me state that I do respect people if they have a boyfriend or girlfriend usually. I wouldn’t try anything with them. But due to her blatant disrespect towards me a previous time, when she didn’t even know me, and she constantly tries to make him her slave, I have no respect for her. I won’t try to stop him from cheating. But then I think, I wouldn’t want that done to me. Though it has been done to me before. I hated it. But in a way, it didn’t surprise me because he seemed like that kind of guy. And M really seems like that kind of guy. So I don’t put it past him. So while I wanted to do stuff with him, and he wanted to too, we didn’t. I didn’t want him to regret when he sobered up. That just sounds weird to say.
And that night, I just couldn’t sleep. No, not because I was overrun with guilt for having a taken man in my bedroom, asking for me. Haha, but because I just am unable to fall asleep with someone in the room with me. And he is especially loud while sleeping, which only made things worse. I think it’s a curse. It’s my favorite time with someone and I can’t sleep. So when I wake up the next morning, I feel sick to my stomach and exhausted. I go to work while he sleeps and then we meet up for coffee during my breakfast break. It’s funny, because he calls me his second wife. Then he mentioned a third wife, a girl he went to school with. Which makes me wonder, how many girls does he think he has lined up for him? I don’t want to be one of those girls in a line. If anything, he’s a man in my line. I won’t let him think that I will wait around for his sorry ass.
And at the end of this I realized some things.
1. I like the physical part of M’s and I’s friendship more than him. I mean, he doesn’t listen to me much. Why put up with him? Because he thinks I’m sexy and wants me, regardless of size. Now, I shouldn’t stoop to that level but when you don’t have much on the field, you will take whatever you got. And it’s very flattering to have a guy want to like this. And call you when he’s drunk to say he misses you and wants to see your face. It sounds like a booty call and maybe it is. But for a person with nothing, everything seems acceptable, though I know when I might regret something.
2. I really can’t sleep when other people are over.
3. I’m not in love with M. Haha. I think maybe I was surprised and infatuated with the idea of him but it wasn’t love. Well, that’s good.
4. I really need sleep.
5. I like physicality. As a large woman, sometime people treat you like a bag of garbage, as in they don’t want to touch you. It’s weird to touch a fat person. And if anyone does touch me, it’s so strange but exciting. So maybe that’s why I kinda don’t mind it when M pulls these stupid stunts. At least he doesn’t pull away if I touch his arm or something. Sometimes when he’s sober but not when he is drunk.
Anyway, I wonder if something like this will happen again. If it does, can it please be on a weekend so I can sleep it off the next day? Thank you.